melmel

my pc has been down the last 5 days due to the absence of product keys to activate Windows, and it's finally working after a kinda long convo with the operator lolx. anw after so much fixing, i jus realised my product keys were at the side of my cpu, almost at the back, abandoned til jus now.

last thurs til sunday, i had been beri down. it was like so outta a sudden. for the past few months, i had been beri happy and contented with my life. onli a single incident had brought tears to my eyes, and it was over in less than a day. on thurs, however, i suddenly felt tt i had lost alot of stuffs, and tt so many things were not gg smoothly for mi. honestly speaking, they were all reli minor stuffs, but somehow something seemed to weigh mi down and i managed to tear over the slightest drawback tt took place.

on friday, i suddenly teared at work, which brought my colleagues to shock. it was so unexpected as it wasn'y my intention at all. i started saying, "oh shit, why am i crying?" and they were in disbelief tt i would ask them the reason for my tears. in the end i told them it was prob cos i felt things were rocky for mi at the moment. so i sorted out with christel my probs, listing them as A, B, C, and tt night, i confided in Vivi. i thot tt since i had sorted out my thinking, it would all return to normal alr.

saturday came, and i teared in public again. this time i sorted stuffs out in a diff way. usually thinking thru would help. but somehow, this time, it din. the depressing feeling jus never seemed to leave mi. i was so upset and troubled. i din wanna feel this way. i jus wanted back my life, the happy life i had the past few months. tt was all i wanted but yet couldn't revert back to it, like smth bad had fallen on mi and din wanna go away..

the next day at church, while we were at praise and worship, i din even haf the enthusiasm to sing. so instead, i prayed. i entrusted everything to the Lord. at tt instant, i knew tt God was with mi and had lifted the unpleasant spirit from mi. i was happy again. there was this joy within mi tt poured out without mi even trying. the relief was so overwhelming. the joy of the Lord had come to mi once more and i no longer felt upset or depressed. i thank God for His blessing upon my life, and for this trial through which i had learnt alot. thinking back, i realised tt thru my unhappiness, i was able to discover more of the ppl who would always stand by mi, and also share the thots and feelings of others, as wel as be a part of their lives. i also thank God for this test of faith, the experience i had gone thru, and for His love and care for mi. i know tt my life in secure in His hands, my Saviour, Lord, and Friend.